Chapter 3: Emotional Immaturity at the Core
Every narcissistic defense begins as an unmet need.
In Chapter 3, Darren Elliott explains that the true core of narcissism is emotional immaturity — an inability to hold discomfort, regulate shame, or tolerate difference. Many adults are still children inside, terrified of rejection but hiding behind control.
This chapter helps readers see emotional immaturity not as moral failure, but as a developmental wound. It offers a compassionate path: growth through self-awareness, accountability, and empathy.
Chapter Summary
The emotionally immature self: reactive, defensive, blaming.
The mature self: grounded, curious, and accountable.
Parenting the inner child: the work of re-parenting the parts that still fear abandonment.
Relational healing: growth happens through safe, loving connection — not isolation.
“Emotional maturity is the courage to feel everything without making it someone else’s fault.”
By naming immaturity as the root of harm, Elliott points us toward the real cure: empathy, responsibility, and community.
Closing Invitation
We can’t heal what we refuse to name — and we can’t grow until we face our fears with compassion.
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