Why Your Relationship Is Dying — And You Don’t Even See It
Many relationships don’t end in one big fight — they fade from small, repeated moments of neglect: the dishes left “for later,” scrolling while your partner talks, only helping when praised, or dismissing their feelings as “too sensitive.”
Over time, these send the message: Your experience doesn’t matter to me.
That’s emotional neglect — and if left unchecked, it can turn into emotional abuse.
Positive Regard: The Everyday Care That Keeps Love Alive
Positive regard is showing care without needing applause — wiping the sink, saying thank you, noticing when your partner is tired and stepping up. These small acts build trust and connection.
Examples:
Do chores without being asked
Respond warmly to texts
Keep promises, even small ones
Say sorry without defending
Negative Regard: Carelessness That Pushes People Away
Negative regard is when your comfort comes before their experience.
Examples:
Ignoring emotional cues
Leaving messes for others to handle
Sulking when asked for help
Turning conversations back to yourself
How to Start Repairing Today
Notice where you show up — and where you don’t.
Choose one act of positive regard to practice daily.
Ask your partner, “What would help you feel cared for?” and listen without defending.
Love isn’t in grand gestures — it’s in consistent, everyday regard.
When you practice that, you become someone safe to love.
